what’s the most irritating thing that men do and what’s the most irritating thing that women do and what can we as men and women do to fix it? What can we do to make our partners feel appreciated? Resentments are the arch enemy of intimacy.

 

The failure to communicate with each other causes non repair able damage to a once strong bond. Communication is not arguing....but simply discussing between the couple all issues.

 

Yes. Absolutely and strongly defending what you want from your partner is never wrong if you are willing to respect what they want. No arguing about this!!! Respect is the cornerstone of every single relationship especially intimate ones.

 

Actually caring and wanting to make your partner feel appreciated. Communication is not arguing...just like @NJDAVE and @cirdellin both touched on. But communication is so important. I think patiance and understanding is vital. I think also working as a team not individually on things. Something that is most hurtful is being made to feel like a possession. Never validate someones feelings. How they feel they have a good reason to feel such a way. I love what you said about resentment too @cirdellin that is very true.

 

Lying is the most irritating thing anyone can do!

Thinskin

 

For me, the most irritating thing that women do is say everything is ok when it’s not. Then they let the resentments build and build until it all comes rushing out about something completely unrelated like trying to decide on which ice cream flavor you want to get at the grocery store! They also expect you to know what they want without them having to tell you. What’s weird is that I have a number of female friends who confirm this.

 

Lying is a relationship killer. Intimacy is built on trust and with that gone, there is little more than sex at best.

 

I could make a list of some smaller pet peeves, but in true form I'll tackle my larger shared issue with both men and women and that's the inherent one sided argument against cheating. Not the act per se which I won't debate is totally the fault of the cheater, but the unbalanced and equally important conversations that should be had of what leads another to that option? It's an almost guaranteed assumption that when someone cheats it was a "spur of the moment", completely selfish and self centered act that came out of nowhere with no justification or provocation. Most assume that it was done covertly and that the cheaters on average made either feeble or no attempt to reconcile the situations that led to it, many suffering for months and years. Or that it was done without any pain in their heart of the cheater being seemingly pushed away many times by someone who either doesn't know how or worse doesn't care to discuss it for fear that they may have to face their role in solving the issue.

Many assume that as the cheater explains their feelings that led to the act it's a way of justifying their transgression rather than the hopes of some form of empathy, not excusing the act itself. The facts that most cheating as shared and well documented through marital, sexual and relationship counselling as having a tumultuous history that led to that level of desperation way before the act ever happened. This never matters in the face of those (I speculate) having been cheated on or knowing someone who's been hurt through cheating, most would rather assume that the action was just that and not a reaction caused in part by them or the person they know that has been affected.

Truth be told most cheaters know that what their doing is wrong and that it's possibly a relationship suicide, but unlike suicide nobody wants to about the feelings that lead to it or talk about it without the usual "just leave" or "things change, get over it" laying the fault as a perception problem with a quick fix. Maybe if the lovers and friends of these possible cheaters had more empathy to recognize the pain experienced while they're trying to do the right thing and fix it, maybe they'd have less to say negatively about or be so quick to jump on that high horse of morality when it finally happens? I never want to condone cheating as a first or even second easy fix and it's through my experiences that I've hoped and have talked many of my own friends (and others) from cheating! Maybe it's time to see both sides clearly before making judgments that the affect wasn't preceded by a cause, even if it was you?

 

Well irritating might be too strong of a word but even though we have sex on a weekly basis, once we are done sex, she really does like to talk about it afterwards.

Well I mean she would if there was a problem, but she really does want to dwell in the after glow as I do. However I’m too much the other way, I can talk about it all week. I like to relive it. Talk about the porn we watched etc. Everything is fine in the bedroom she simple rather not have a review and discussion about it. Ha

 

I’ve told the women in my life to do whatever they have to to resolve their issues immediately . Yell at me or even hit me if it dispatches her concerns immediately, but I don’t recommend recommending the latter because one girl took me up on it .

 

One that that could be more irritating than I mentioned previously, is my wife is a germ-a-phobe. Gotten worse as we get older. It’s not a totally bad thing but she can get overly precautious. - Takes the fun out of outdoor sex.

 

If y’all don’t keep the landing strip clear ..there’s nowhere to land my craft. If I can’t land my craft ..no one gets any bananas. Now how is anyone supposed to go bananas if they can’t get bananas?

That there is as plain as a gorilla bite.

 

Our main mistake is to let woman to forget who is in charge. Once they take the bit betwen their teeth it is much harder to show them their place. Cause whenever they got a hold on a man and subdue him. they start whining that they want a man to hide behind. When they have a strong minded man they want a Pussy of a man that says sweet things to them< buy them roses, and takes care of his nails. So I guess we man mast not to forget to remind those women who has a belt on his trousers, ... tallnfit did you buy yourself a decent belt. ? Or I ll have to ship it for ya, and then charge you.

 

Trust and knowing ones self. Communist is key to build trust and knowing yourself help you inform you lover whats good and what has changed. I have never been good at mind reading.
I crave responsibility, But I will not take what has not been given freely. So if your likes have changed or you are feeling distant and dont want the same thing anymore. Thats on them to bring up.
A persons feeling may drive behavers but feels can be wrong and theres many couples how have brocken up over feeling just to learn that there feelings where wrong but the damage is done. I belive we must take about feeling but not let them control our lives.

 

It’s intriguing that the girls have been so quiet on this one . I’m curious what we guys do that drives you absolutely out of your mind. I once asked a female friend this question and her answer was that guys are just plain stupid she said to her boyfriend once I mean here I am crying here so can’t you hold me or something? Anything? Do you girls relate to this?

 

I dunno. If I could ever figure out a woman, I would be a millionaire.

 

When women bitch just for the sake of bitching............... i wanna just fuck dudes for the rest of my life.

 

Not telling the truth when it is needed. In fact very few people can take the absolute truth, it is too painful or scary or ...

 

Ask, “what is the most irritating thing.....”

 

Notice how many men responded with things that drive them crazy. I wonder why not many women responded.....cause most men do not hear what a woman has to say. Men listen but do not hear. Lol I bet that would be close to number one on every womans list.